BrentonGuide to Girls (For Good Boys)
March 30th 2008 14:46
First thing: This is not a layguide or any such thing – there are a plethora of works out there telling men how to manipulate and use women. That is not what this is.
Essentially I have written this for those faceless throngs of gentlemen who find themselves unable to communicate on a very basic social level with women. It won’t make anyone a seduction expert, but it might demonstrate a few common issues that a lot of blokes discover, that can really limit the quality of life and social interaction they experience.
It would be understandable if one had reached the point where one expected that to meet and get along with girls, it is a liberty to have a conscience attached to you that doesn’t permit you to treat girls like rubbish. You can’t quite work out why this stands in your way, and girls would prefer to get with some total jerk than you. You’ve had a scan over ‘how to’ websites and write ups, but the moral of the story always seems to be that you have to treat women like tissues to succeed – something that doesn’t gel with your own philosophy.
The good news is that you don’t have to be a jerk to communicate with girls. The bad news is that you are going to have to do some stuff differently.
1. The first thing you have to do is recognise that you’ve permitted yourself to be taken in by a cruel fallacy; that only bad men can meet girls. This is crap. The truth is that bad men are simply better at doing certain things than good men. These are things like, being confident, talking clearly, and using strong body language. Most of this is stuff you’ll pick up in due time.
2. Be confident. Accept that you are a worthwhile human being. A lot of what we think others see in us is really what we see in ourselves. You need to allow yourself the right to be respected. Until this one thing changes NOTHING changes.
3. Don’t freak out when girls talk sex. Guys talk it all the time, so why do you freak out when girls discuss it? This is not to tell you to become a drooling dickhead over girls, but just to be prepared to acknowledge that sex is, like, a thing that, like, exists, instead of glossing over it and trying to pretend it doesn’t exist. Don’t avoid taking part in these conversations, as you’re aware of the female company. Girls can have mature conversations WAY before blokes can even say ‘nipple’ without giggling. It’s just maturity; if you want to be seen as an adult, you have to be comfortable with adult conversations.
4. Talk to girls. That’s right. Start the conversation. Stop looking for reasons not to. No, you’re not intruding on her life. No, she won’t shoot you. No, you can’t wear a mask.
5. Don’t apologise. Unless you actually do something wrong like dropping food on her, stepping on her foot, kicking her dog, burning her house down etc. If you do that, then sure apologise. But I’m sorry to take up your time/sorry to ask/sorry to interrupt just creates the illusion of you being whiny and annoying.
6. GIRLS AREN’T SQUIDS. Can you imagine how awkward it would be to talk to a squid? “Um hey so… yeah… how are you… um… so… you like kelp?” Luckily, girls aren’t squid. They’re people like you and me. See, what goes so horribly wrong so often if that there’s this whole OMGGURLZ!!! Mindset going on. Those horrible arrogant shmucks who we see stealing girls hearts and then shredding them? They think they’re so good that they treat everyone as equally lesser. You don’t have to treat everyone as lesser, but treating lads and lasses the SAME is the key – girls are people, and unless you start acting like it, and having normal person conversations, then you might as well go talk to a squid.
7. Have something to talk about. This essentially translates as shut down your computer and go do something interesting. The most important and practical social skills come singularly from life experience.
Essentially, the complication most people find when trying to have conversations with girls, is simply the perception that there are any complications. Keep this in mind, relax, and allow yourself the chance to feel confident, and you’ll be fine.
Essentially I have written this for those faceless throngs of gentlemen who find themselves unable to communicate on a very basic social level with women. It won’t make anyone a seduction expert, but it might demonstrate a few common issues that a lot of blokes discover, that can really limit the quality of life and social interaction they experience.
It would be understandable if one had reached the point where one expected that to meet and get along with girls, it is a liberty to have a conscience attached to you that doesn’t permit you to treat girls like rubbish. You can’t quite work out why this stands in your way, and girls would prefer to get with some total jerk than you. You’ve had a scan over ‘how to’ websites and write ups, but the moral of the story always seems to be that you have to treat women like tissues to succeed – something that doesn’t gel with your own philosophy.
The good news is that you don’t have to be a jerk to communicate with girls. The bad news is that you are going to have to do some stuff differently.
1. The first thing you have to do is recognise that you’ve permitted yourself to be taken in by a cruel fallacy; that only bad men can meet girls. This is crap. The truth is that bad men are simply better at doing certain things than good men. These are things like, being confident, talking clearly, and using strong body language. Most of this is stuff you’ll pick up in due time.
2. Be confident. Accept that you are a worthwhile human being. A lot of what we think others see in us is really what we see in ourselves. You need to allow yourself the right to be respected. Until this one thing changes NOTHING changes.
3. Don’t freak out when girls talk sex. Guys talk it all the time, so why do you freak out when girls discuss it? This is not to tell you to become a drooling dickhead over girls, but just to be prepared to acknowledge that sex is, like, a thing that, like, exists, instead of glossing over it and trying to pretend it doesn’t exist. Don’t avoid taking part in these conversations, as you’re aware of the female company. Girls can have mature conversations WAY before blokes can even say ‘nipple’ without giggling. It’s just maturity; if you want to be seen as an adult, you have to be comfortable with adult conversations.
4. Talk to girls. That’s right. Start the conversation. Stop looking for reasons not to. No, you’re not intruding on her life. No, she won’t shoot you. No, you can’t wear a mask.
5. Don’t apologise. Unless you actually do something wrong like dropping food on her, stepping on her foot, kicking her dog, burning her house down etc. If you do that, then sure apologise. But I’m sorry to take up your time/sorry to ask/sorry to interrupt just creates the illusion of you being whiny and annoying.
6. GIRLS AREN’T SQUIDS. Can you imagine how awkward it would be to talk to a squid? “Um hey so… yeah… how are you… um… so… you like kelp?” Luckily, girls aren’t squid. They’re people like you and me. See, what goes so horribly wrong so often if that there’s this whole OMGGURLZ!!! Mindset going on. Those horrible arrogant shmucks who we see stealing girls hearts and then shredding them? They think they’re so good that they treat everyone as equally lesser. You don’t have to treat everyone as lesser, but treating lads and lasses the SAME is the key – girls are people, and unless you start acting like it, and having normal person conversations, then you might as well go talk to a squid.
As is clearly demonstrated in this here diagram a girl is incredibly different from a squid. This fact need only to remind us that we are not in the unenviable position of trying to imitate tentacles and yell 'fphllbibibibib' in order to communicate, but can simply treat Girls (left) as persons much like our own selves or comrades
7. Have something to talk about. This essentially translates as shut down your computer and go do something interesting. The most important and practical social skills come singularly from life experience.
Essentially, the complication most people find when trying to have conversations with girls, is simply the perception that there are any complications. Keep this in mind, relax, and allow yourself the chance to feel confident, and you’ll be fine.
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